“Had it been written on toilet paper, it would have had some value…”
Just to nuance the notion that some things aren’t even worth the paper they’re written on…
Header image: by Vlada Karpovich from Pexels, Link
Problems getting into bed
“I have sleeping problems. Or, to be more precise, problems getting into bed in the evening.”
“You know it’s good if your bedroom is cool, right?”
“I see. So you’re saying if my bed is on fire, I might have some problems motivating myself to go to bed? Good to know…”
Nope. My problems are in no way, shape or form related to the temperature of the bedroom, nor have I been drinking alcohol…. Computer screens… sure, if they make me forget to do the dishes, make dinner and that it’s 4am. I guess I could blame the screens…
Question everything!
A: Question everything!
B: Why should I?
A: …
In the FBI-manual
“He gave them 15 canisters of the QR-gas!”
“It’s enough to wipe out Lower Manhattan!”
“How do you know that?”
“It’s in the FBI-manual. Keep up!”
Will AI revolutionize agriculture?
Question: Will AI revolutionize agriculture?
AI aficionado: Yes! Blah blah blah blah blah……
Question: Will AI revolutionize agriculture?
Farmer*: No, I don’t think so. It will, however, help us become more resource effective, lower our losses and increase our yield. It’s a good tool.
* You can probably replace “Farmer” with any other pro that isn’t specialized in selling AI, and you’ll get a similar reply.
Finding a needle in a stack of needles
“It’s like finding a needle in a stack of needles…”
“You do realize that’s only hard if you’re looking for a specific needle and not just any old needle, right?”
“Eh… right…”
Header image: Link
Zero-sum game
He lived his life as if it were a zero-sum game, and at his funeral, everybody agreed his life’s contribution was zero-sum.
Rapper Response Team
The bad guys are singing a cappella. Send in the rapper response team!
Polystyrene
– The polygraph isn’t good enough. We’re going to use the polystyrene instead. We’re going to steerene things up around here…
– What does that mean?
– We put them in a circle, spin the polystyrene, and it will tell us who did it…
Real programs
Real programs do not require save anymore… they autosave out of the box, everywhere. (Looking at you, Office…)
